Under Construction ...

Ten Monologues a Certain Person Starting With V is Mildly Obsessed With Performing.

1. The infinity of space, the immense size of space and it unfathomable emptiness.
2. The importance of living for the Now.
3. Part-less particles—do not start, don’t ask, don’t even look vaguely interested.
4. Why young girls smoke. Ask him to do his smoking imitation—it’s uncanny for someone who doesn’t smoke. Someone has been awfully vigilant in their awareness of the habits of others.
5. ‘I was waiting at the lights on a one way street and this woman turns into the street the wrong way. She had to mount the curb to get past me. I rolled the window down: I just wanted to tell her in case she didn’t realise. I said, “Did you realise that this is a one-way street?” I wasn’t shouting; I wasn’t rude. And you know what she said, and she said it like this, “Fuck off” (normal volume, slowly enunciated, upward inflection on the end). “Fuck off.” Just like that, and she carries on driving. Just like that: “Fuck off.”’
6. ‘When he started working we all called him X, that’s what it said on his application form. Then one day I am speaking to him and he’s ignoring me. Eventually he turns around and says: “My name’s Y not X”. It was always X; where did Y come from? One day he was X and now he is Y. I don’t understand.