Ten False Names I Could Give if I was a Miss Universe Hopeful Trying to Evade a Charge of Driving Without a Licence.

1. Michelle Goldingay. (Nom de Maree. It would come off the top of my mind quickly, seem slightly like the truth, and still slow paperwork down long enough for me to move to another country.)
2. Juniper de Vie. (Pseudonym)
3. Rhapsody de Fruit. (Pronounced: Fwee) (Nom de Drag)
4. CE Colin. (Nom de Plume) (Stands for Colin Eustice Colin: attempts to be illustrious, attempts to be male. Really, how many Noble Peace Prize winning authors are female?)
5. September Allen. (Nom de Plume: Mills and Boon)
6. Error. (Nom de Hip Hop et Crumping)
7. Stella Disario. (Courtesy of S) (Nom de Plume: Crime Fiction)
8. Taile Aftonwold. (Nom de Plume: Erotica) (Pinched the old first-pet, first-street trick for establishing porn names and made it a little new age with the 'e' on my cat Tail's name.)
9. Fi-fi le Monde. (Nom de Plume: Advice Columnist) (Thanks Isabella--it's perfect. Fi-fi engenders just the level of seriousness an advice columnist should have, le Monde shows her worldliness. I love it. Do I owe you royalties?)
10. Siempre Caracola (Nom de Lucha Libre) (Again Isabella, thanks. Isabella suggested Sometimes Shellii. This name also has a ring of truth. That made me recall that siempre (always) is one of my favorite spanish words. Shellii or shell doesn't translate (on my dictionary.com translator) but caracola is a conch. It rolls fabolously off the tongue: 'And in the right hand corner, weighing in at %^$&pounds, Sssssssiieeeempreee Caracoooolaaaaaa!" Waaaa, hooooo! The crowd goes wild.) (oh, dear)